okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
It's never too late to be topless.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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