everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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