He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
