she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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