Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
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