paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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