I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
How naked do you want me to be?
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