Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize