The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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