You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I want to be your penis for a week.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
