soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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