carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Randomize
