He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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