sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
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