he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
