i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
