last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize