I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
