As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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