i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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