you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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