I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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