There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
where are my eyebrows?
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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