4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
