So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize
