Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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