we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
