Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize