we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
