I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Randomize
