Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
