Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
