So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
YAS. BRING CRAB.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
