Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Randomize