For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
