Only a mothe r could love this liver
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
