There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize