$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
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