And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I think weed is turning my hair brown
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
