Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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