i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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