He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
