She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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