Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
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