lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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