Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
