it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
