Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
