We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Just pee around me
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
