who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
