Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
